Answers

I drank too heavily and took drugs in early adulthood, I was of course negatively judged and misunderstood during this period, indeed I still am off of the back of it from time to time, but there was method and good reason behind the madness, there still is - escapism from a badly run world full of bad people, but mostly the thinking on the same. You party on a rotten apple, you have to make it look artificially beautiful and fill it with artificial love. The world as it is still upsets me now, but I guess with age, the anger, the will, and the dreams subside, you get world hardened by the way it is and settle in.